Hospice - again

Just about three years ago we put Les on Hospice care.  Now my dad is on Hospice care.

On Tuesday, the neurologist informed us there is nothing else they can do for dad.  She, and the hospital doctor, advised that dad be put on Hospice care.  We did not expect that!  We thought they would get the meds controlled and dad would return to his shuffling, sometime mumbling, sometime talking old self!!  But Hospice!

Since then dad has been resting quietly.  He is unresponsive.  His eyes don't open.  He is on no meds - not even for his cholesterol or his high blood pressure or his Parkinsons.  He is not eating and he is not drinking.  He isn't hooked up to anything.   He coughs every now and then but that's about it.

We are waiting to transfer him to the Christian Healthcare Center here in town.  Hospice thinks he might be able to move tomorrow.  That will be much easier for mom to pop in and out for visits.  Now she spends most of her day at the hospital.  My brother Don was here last weekend.  My sister Becky is here this weekend, my sister Sharon comes on Tuesday.  Mom and I are so grateful for their visits!  Dad has had lots of visitors.  Pastor Ken loves to sing when he visits and asks everyone in the room to join in.  We have been playing dad's beloved Gaither music for him.

Please pray for comfort and peace for dad, and peace for mom.  We don't know God's timing, but we know it is perfect. One of my verses this morning:  Psalm 62:8 "Trust in Him at all times, O people, pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge."

Dad Update

Thanks so much for your prayers!!  Many of you have been asking for an update on my Dad.   Easiest way is to blog!

A mutual love!

Last Sunday morning Dad was brought in to ER.  The overnight help we had, sweet Elizabeth, had been up with him almost all night.  When mom got up, Elizabeth recommended we bring him in.  Faithful nurse Kay was called and she came over to help make the decision.  Nothing could be done for dad, he was so so agitated!

I was out of town.  My niece Gretta Claire was in the Apple Blossom Pageant on Saturday night, and I decided to make a quick trip to Wenatchee to attend.  We had 24 hour care for Dad, so I felt okay leaving.  I had a great drive over the mountain - the sun was shining on those glorious mountains.  It does the soul good to see the majesty.  Gretta Claire won - she is the queen.  It was such a fun night!  I stayed with my niece Dani and her family - we always have a great time together.

On my way home Sunday morning, friends Jay and Marlene advised me Dad was in ER.  I went straight to the hospital and met mom in ER.  Dad was still there, but he was going to be admitted to the hospital.  We talked with the neurologist on duty.  He was going to slash Dad's medications and see if he was perhaps over-medicated.  At this point, Dad was very agitated.  He didn't know who we were.  I decided to take mom home - we didn't need to be there for that.  We knew he was safe and that the nurses would take good care of him.

Long story short, Dad is still in the hospital.  He has not been on his feet since Sunday morning.  Thursday when I was there, I fed him his lunch.  He's eating pretty good, but has no strength or energy.  Sometimes he is fairly aware of what's going on, other times he is not.  His pattern is to get worse in the late afternoon/evening.  This is apparently referred to as "Sundowners" and is common with dementia.  The doctors are playing around a little with his meds, but it appears this will be the new normal.   Yesterday, tho, Dad was unresponsive all day.  He would mumble, he would eat his food, but he wouldn't open his eyes.  When Pastor Ken, Kay, Mom and my brother Don sang Amazing Grace, dad mouthed the words!   We left him resting quietly last night.

We are not sure when he will be released.  At this point, it looks as if he will go directly to the Christian Health Care Center.  We aren't sure if that will be permanent or not.  We are not sure if he could be transferred later to one of the memory care facilities we visited.  He will not be going back home.

My mom is doing well.  She is relieved to not be responsible for him at home.  It's hard to watch your spouse deteriorate - I know this all too well!!!   Dad usually knows mom and asks for her often.  He was asking quite often for us to get him out of there.......and he also shows his humor often.  He tries to make jokes with the nurses.  That is good to see!

Dreary Days

Dreary days of the Northwest here lately.  Rain rain rain.  Not much sunshine.  We haven't had much wintery stuff, except for the big ice storm the first of January - but yikes we have had dark rainy days.

Another dreary thing is my Dad's decline with his Parkinson's.  My dad has had Parkinson's about 10 years, but it has really kicked his butt this past month.  We can hardly believe the rapid decline.  He is having hallucinations, he talks total nonsense, he is falling more often............ it just isn't very fun.

My dad is the youngest of 5 kids.  He was born in Iowa - moved briefly here in Washington, and then his mom (grandma Grace) moved them down to southern California. My dad did not graduate from high school; he started driving truck, married my mom and had a baby before he was 20!

 Dad has always liked to have a good time and my parents were very social...playing softball, going water skiing, barbeques.... Mom and dad decided they didn't want to raise their childern in Southern California so they moved to southwest Washington and bought a dairy farm (he knew nothing about running a dairy - but he succeeded!).  After 5 years of that daily hard work of milking, he decided to be a hay farmer instead and bought a hay farm in eastern Washington.  This was a very busy life in the summer with more time off in the winter.  We had a water ski boat;  we snow skied; dad raced mini-Indy cars - he golfed, he hunted, they made lots of trips to Hawaii, he snowmobiled.  Dad loved being busy, he loved being social, he loved having a good time.  He always had a good joke to tell!

Trucking in California

Farming in eastern Washington

Race car driving

Fun on Dad's fishing boat!

After they retired, dad golfed ALOT and him and mom spent winters in Palm Springs golfing and playing tennis.  He loved to fish up in Canada.  They had a motor home and enjoyed traveling America and also did several "work" trips with CRWRC helping in disaster zones.  And then he was diagnosed with Parkinson's.

My mom has been amazing through all of this.  The past few months she has been so so good with dad.  But now she can't take care of him anymore.  He doesn't listen to her and he is too strong for her.  I spent two nights this past week at their house - to help when Dad wakes up in the night.  This has been exhausting.  Mom finally made the decision that Dad needs to live somewhere else - somewhere that is safe for him.  The other day he walked outside a couple of times, he tried to light the gas stove - it is just too dangerous for him to be at home. We now have a care giver in the house for 24 hours a day.  Mom and I are checking out care facilities to decide what place will be best for Dad.  Please pray for us as we navigate this new season of life for my parents.

Dad's 80th birthday last year

BUT - the sun is supposed to come out today.  There is still much joy in my life.  I have a new grandson, Cash Keith (Keith was Les' middle name).  What a gift to hold this new born baby in the middle of all this.  I have other joy in my life and that will be the next blog!